Mental Health And Self Care

Simultaneously feeling isolated and overwhelmed. Out at a meal today I had the tightening of a dread knot in my stomach, clumsy words and an intense desire to leave the table and never return. I’ve  not felt this way in a while.  This morning I didn’t find any joy in writing my novel. Uncomfortable and anxious at the epic task ahead of me.

There are a plethora of reasons I could be feeling this way. I will always jump to the worst conclusion; My depression has returned with a vengeance and I will feel this way forever. However, it is far more likely that my busy week has left me feeling just a little run down. Not to mention a dramatic bus ride home in which I hugged a crying little girl as her drunken dad picked a fight.

I’ve avoided practising mindfulness and pilates, two activities that force me to pause in the day. Instead, I’ve been bulldozing through, sidestepping any silence. I have a check list for such scenarios.

  1. Tell the husband and support network
  2. Figure out what I’m feeling and why
  3. Practice self-care
  4. If things do not improve go to the doctor

Self Care

  • Address pressures and anxieties
  • Look at Schedule to make sure I’m not pushing myself too hard.
  • practise good sleep hygiene
  • Eat regular healthy meals and snacks
  • Keep to a consistent routine
  • Leave the house at least once a day
  • Practice Mindfulness

Word count since the last post: 1209

Today’s word count: 365

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Writing Through The Asthma

I am once again on antibiotics for a chest infection and steroids for my asthma. This is my morning lot of medication.

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However, I have been able to work a fair bit on my novel. I’ve made a little rewards chart for wordcount goal I reach.  For the first 2100 words, I get a little reward for every 100 words. including, sharpening new pencils, buying a pack of Veggie Percy Pigs and having a bubble bath with scented candles. After that it’s rewards after every 200 words, then every 300 words. That should get me up to 10,000 words of my revised draft by new years.

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As most of my ‘writing’ is editing and making small adjustments I am using strikethrough instead of deleting so I can count my cutting as writing!

Today’s Wordcount: 618

This week’s word count: 1119

The Wonder Of To Do Lists

Today is the first in a long time in which I have had nothing planned through the day. Last night I wrote a really strong to do list. the things I was avoiding don’t seem quite so daunting written down.  After a bit of a lie in I checked the master list, then wrote a to do today list, picking out the most pressing tasks, ordering a cheque book, paying bills etc.

I also got the chance to sit down for a good couple of hours and revise the opening of my novel. It’s my piece to read aloud for the writing group tomorrow. Super nervous but also excited.

Today’s Wordcount: 830