Today I had to write down all of my conditions and diagnosis.
A small list that has defined me for many years. Some are still very much present whereas others I am well into recovery. Depression hasn’t caught up with me for over a year and although I still have to be careful with disordered eating I am no longer Anorexic or bulimic.
Asthma is finally being managed thanks to Montelukast, one tablet and night and two puffs of Duo-resp in the morning and I’m good to go. There are times when my asthma affects my day to day activities but these are one offs and fixed with steroids or antibiotics. there was a time when I had to take my inhaler more than eight times a day and still not have the symptoms under control.
Dyslexia, not so much a condition as a different way of learning and living. I have my tinted lenses, an abundance of apps and planners to keep me organised and am learning to be more patient with the way my mind works.
Anxiety still causes a great deal of stress in my life. Flashbacks and adrenaline spikes can be debilitating. meditation is helpful, therapy too, but there are certain traumas in my life which I do not feel able to confront. Without processing these past events my anxiety will continue to hamper my quality of life.
I may well be adding something new to the list. ADD. Its why I wrote all these conditions down in the first place. For several years I have suspected I may have some form of ADD. Some major symptoms I suffer from are rejection sensitivity, forgetting appointments, fidgeting, difficulty focusing on and remembering what people are saying to me, constantly loosing things, being easily distracted by noises around me, difficulty waiting my turn and interrupting people when they are busy.
Wish me well on this one. I dont know what a diagnosis would even mean but I do believe knowing is better than not, hopefully there will be some techniques I can learn that help with anxiety.
Thanks for reading folx, stay safe if you can
Today I wrote 349 words