Do You Remember When We First Met

So my best friend wrote this about me. I couldn’t help but show it off.

by Elizabeth Lovatt

(for my best friend) 

Do you remember when we first met? Don’t worry, I don’t either.

So here goes, it went like this:

You standing there small and delicate with your light brown hair falling loose down your back and your big Disney eyes which later would get you cast as the Little Matchstick Girl in our school play. You standing there with your mother’s stubborn chin, determination on your face, ignoring all the other kids and looking only at me.

‘Hello,’ you said, confident, as if it was the easiest thing in the world, as if the first day of nursery was no big deal and making friends wasn’t the making of us. Oh, but it was.

Or maybe it went like this:

Me, hiding behind my mum’s legs, pressing nose and cheek into the nylon rub of her knee, until glancing up – I see…

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Things Are Just A Little Bit More Difficult

My husband has been ill with an undiagnosed stomach issue for coming up to two years now. We have seen many doctors and had umpteen tests. none of which have been able to shed any light on what is actually making him ill.

The most frustrating aspect of this illness is the unpredictability. it is almost impossible to plan things because we have no idea whether he will be well enough to leave the house. This is, unsurprisingly making him feel low.

It turns out I am pretty dreadful at coping with other people’s emotions. I find it incredibly difficult to negotiate my anxiety and depression when I feel like I should be caring for my husband. This week I hid within myself. Keeping busy until there’s no energy to keep going. My Novel seemed like a colossal mountain and even five minutes of mindfulness was almost unbearable because of the barrage of negative thoughts.

Things are a little better now. We’ve spoken and decided to have an action plan for keeping positive and motivated even when he has no energy.  I did manage to work on my novel this morning and sorted out a bit of dialogue which was bugging me. The first Three scenes are now completed and I’m over halfway through the fourth.

Today’s Wordcount: 519